My Mommy Identity August 2, 2016 by Danielle Marcous I have been sleeping for 2 hours and 17 minutes and there it is, the first cry of the morning. I roll over to look at the baby monitor and it’s 5:28, guess it’s time to get up. I grab my bathrobe while running downstairs so I get there before he erupts into tears. Ah, the cute little face that I don’t mind waking up to at the crack of dawn each morning. This is our time. We will hang on the couch, I will drink a cup of coffee and he will sit in my lap for the next hour cooing and staring out the window. Has Nespresso noticed that I only drink decaf these days, but that my consumption has gone up 4x? Somehow this has turned into a morning routine. I grab the mouse which is poised on the end of the couch. Time to see what’s going on outside our 1,500 square- foot condo. The wall mounted flat screen has become my window to the world. It still shocks me how completely out of touch you can be when a little one enters the picture. His needs are all consuming. On that note, time for a wardrobe change. After a full sponge bath via baby wipe and a new clean onesie we are back to our couch routine. Chrome is already open to a Yahoo newsfeed. At a quick glance I can already tell that this is not my Google+ account. The newsfeed is filled with Space X, Star Trek and Pokémon go. Click to “switch person.” There we go…The new “Phantom Diet,” immigration law reform and a dog rescued from a rooftop. Definitely my Chrome! My connection to the outside world for the last two and a half months has largely been through this 72 inch screen. Little things like Chrome remembering my passwords and Yahoo customizing my newsfeeds are not only a luxury but have become status quo. Now on to my email. I have 17 from eBay; these are all of the customized searches that I have created over these last few months. I wonder why eBay can’t consolidate these into one email and why aren’t they massively targeting me? I am wildly predictable. I only search for insanely expensive, Scandinavian, organic cotton baby clothes in shades of gray that are new or gently used. Next three emails are Amazon shipping confirmations. In 10 and a half weeks I have ordered 57 items from Amazon, 16 of which were packages of Nature Diapers which supposedly have the lowest eco-footprint on the market, are 100% hypoallergenic and just happen to be imported from Denmark. Nothing but the best for this smooth pink bottom. Every morning as I click through the screens I am providing a full profile of myself to a multitude of brands and online shopping avenues. I’ve given half a dozen children’s websites my email address in exchange for a percent off my first order coupon. Not one of them asked me if my child was male or female or how old he was… I would have told them. I am the perfect target for someone to profile, segment and market to me. My baby starts daycare in a month and there is a laundry list of items he needs. But where are you? Why aren’t you showing me the latest and greatest in overly priced, eco friendly, European imported baby gear? Time to focus on my coffee and pick lint out of this little guys toes. Brands have 20 minutes of my attention each day. How could they have used what they know about me to provide a relevant, targeted touch point? When I go back to the office in a few weeks I will be back to the job of helping our customers leverage identity to differentiate themselves from the pack.